NOT EATING!!!!/138

Holy shit what happened to me?!?!?!?! 

I was down to 135 just two days ago and then yesterday I stepped on the scale and it said 138, so I didn't freak out I didnt say anything I thought it was water weight because I was chugging water all night but then I got on the scale today praying my weight would be down but it was still 138. I fucked up!!! what did I do?!?!?!

Needless to say I am not fucking eating today. well I am eating as little as possible my boyfriend will have to get the fuck over it. It is one day. I ate one piece of toast today. 70 cals.  It is only 1030am though!

I have to do this though I am so pissed off at my self right now!!!! I want to say some mean things about myself but I will hold back for your guys sake. I am going to do this!!! 

We are going to the mall when I get out of school I basically forced my boyfriend to go but I need to find my mom a mothers day present. Plus it is the best distraction I could think of to keep myself  from eating right when I get home like I usually do. That  should buy me till about 5 or 6pm and then my boyfriend wants to go hang out with our friend so I hope I can not eat over at there house. I WILL NOT EAT AT THERE HOUSE!!!

I am so upset. I know I had like four drinks the other night but I DID NOT think I would make me gain 3 lbs WTF is wrong with  me. I was doing so well

ANYWAY 

Here is some inspiration for my FAT ass.

IF you have not seen black swan you should see it. Natalie Portman is some real thinspiration in that movie and to get me motivated here are a couple pics of her!

And here are some skinny legs!!!

I would put more but I am in school and I don't want anyone seeing.